Friday, August 12, 2011

What does it mean? Li li li, li li li li li li li li li li li li

When this year was brand new, I looked at a calendar page of the months ahead. I gave each month a name. Whatever word streamed out, I wrote it down. It has been interesting to look back and see how each month has fulfilled its prophecy. I've tried not to think about it as the months start. For some reason August, "isolate", has been on my mind though. I'm not sure what isolate is supposed to mean. Right now it feels like separating myself out from the things I've clung to. Standing in my power. My drummer. My voice.
Today has been set up perfectly for me to do the things I love most - by myself. I started up early with a prenatal at 7 am. How cool to start the day with strong fetal heart tones and a radiant mom. Already showered and dressed, I was home by 8 am. No one here but one black dog. I made my favorite breakfast, listened to my favorite play list, lit up some brand new yummy candles, smudged my office with some Briana bundled sage and now I'm off. To do. What I love most. Work in my office.
I've been running in sheer survival mode for several months. Many, many deep thanks from the very bottom of my heart to all of you true loves that have carried me. I delegated out my work, my errands, my housekeeping, my thinking, my self care and even my breathing at times.
Today feels like the old saying: "Today is the first day of the rest of your life." Here I go. First up, chart review. I love to mentally check in with each mom that way. Then a couple of phone calls to take care of burdensome business. Hopefully the afternoon will be an opportunity to catch up on emails (one month behind!). I can already feel the giddiness of catching up.
And then, and then, hello Africa. Thanks for patiently waiting. I've got plans for you.
As for Simon and Garfunkel. . .It's full moon eve. Turn this one up loud. Sing out.
I have to include a favorite Paul and Artie moment here. A few years ago, me, Lin, Aurora and her mom went to Seattle for the long awaited Old Friends tour. It was a great concert. The crowd was mostly "polite". We didn't care. When Cecilia started up, we were on our feet, crazy, happy dancing. I bought a T-shirt. Loved it. Wore it on my happiest of days. Old Friends.
Anyway, this day of solitude has been a long time coming. I think I might be able to hear myself today.
i love you. all is groovy.


Jade said...

i love this. and your simon and garfunkel gives me kennewick memories of you with that old cd player attached to the cupboard.

Hollywood said...

isolate. accomplish. focus. clarity. breathe. replenish.

good for you!

amy said...

Hi Cathy, just thought I'd say hi. I was thinking of you!

I can't wait to hear about your time in Africa...