Peaceful Sunday

Reflecting

Summer solstice is only weeks away. On a quiet afternoon, one year ago, I was sitting in my living room thinking. Just thinking. I had no idea what was ahead of me, only what was behind me. The Summer of Baby Love was ramping up, my mom's 70th birthday celebration was in the works and my best friend ever, Gina would be arriving in a few weeks. I opened my laptop and let The Beatles distract me. I think I listened to In My Life.

The unknowns ahead of me were on my mind. So many babies, so much to do. I chose to open my heart to whatever I needed to learn, to trust fully and to love deeply. The babies started coming, The Birthday was wonderful and Gina and I resumed best girlfriend behavior.

It has been a good year, an amazing year. I'm ready to go again. All that is asked of me is to stand ready and embrace the experiences that are gifted to me.

Here are some places that my path took me, some things and people that I love. No particular order. Just random things that filled me in the past year.

Thank you life for such goodness. I'm looking forward to more. Here, There and Everywhere. . .

At Blackwelder's, Laguna Niguel

Strong and gentle hand

Big Sur

Monterey

Solo road trip

The "stuff" for moonlight hiking on Mt. Timp

NYC

November moon

My house

MANA Conference

My sisters, Mt. View, WY

Student Midwives, MCU Fall Conference

Sleeping whenever, wherever possible

Pausing

Blue Moon, New Year's Eve

Mt.Shasta

Jeff and Jade

Pretzel

Mini me? I like to think so!

forever

Hippie Christmas

Presley's 4th Birthday

Barb and Don came to help us celebrate with a big tie dye party.

Tie dye is their business and we love having experts teach us how.

Spiral, peace sign, burning man, heart, diamond, rainbow, or scrunchy clouds. . .

When the choosing, folding, scrunching, tying, squirting, wrapping,

rubber banding is done, the shirts have to sit.

Yes, untouched for 24 hours and absolutely no peeking!

Finally, when they are unwrapped and rinsed, the design is revealed.

This unwrapping is known as Hippie Christmas.

It was soooo much fun.

Hippie Christmas Tree!

the colors of the rainbow,

so pretty in the sky. . .

and I think to myself,

what a wonderful world!

midwife love

The Stoyan's are coming... 3 more sleeps. That's how the kids count down. We can't wait!

I found this while searching for some birth class documents. Lindsay must have written it when they lived here with Baby Lucas almost 4 years ago. As we prepare for the ultrasound next week of Stoyan baby #3, I am amazed at how fast time flies, how much we learn and how richly we have been blessed. I am also preparing myself for a busy season of births. Supplies have been stocked, checklists nearly completed, I'm going to bed earlier and simply "settling in". This writing, an observation by my daughter, means a lot to me. It's nice to be reminded that the work that I love matters. Yes, Love Matters.

"my own momma is a midwife. she leaves in the middle of the night and sometimes comes home days later. she listens to heart beats, measures bellies, holds hands, and just plain listens to her "ladies". i've always admired that she's found her true passion and is so good at what she does. i was so thankful to have her so close to my own heart/life/belly when i was pregnant with lucas. i knew very early on that i was capable of birthing my babe. the empowerment she instilled in me and my sweet andrey saved my life when our homebirth went a bit (a big bit) off track. it's healed my heartache at the fact that things didn't go as "planned." and that i'm not sure how they'll go the next time around.
i went to a prenatal with her a few weeks ago and met sweet sarah. sweet beautiful sarah. belly full of baby. her home was so dreamy. everything i could ever wish for. her baby was on it's way. i listened to my mom tell her anxious mama bird heart "any day now." i watched at home as my mom gathered up her supplies, went to bed early so she'd be well rested, checked on sarah daily, and prepared her spirit to help guide miss sarah through her babes birth story. i woke up a few days back and the house was still and quiet and mom's car was gone. i sent every bit of birth energy i had out into the world and hoped it made its way to sarah's pretty little birth space. desmond grey was born that morning. every perfect tiny inch of her."

I picked Tamra up at midnight enroute to this birth. She did an amazing job capturing this beautiful story with her camera. Soon I will be present at Tamra's birth, my third with her.

I also love this birth for the memory of having Katia with me. It was the first time I called her to assist and the beginning of a rich summer together.

Thank you sweet Lindsay for another record of this experience. Before we know it, we'll be gathered in your home as a new birth story unfolds. I am honored to be your midwife and proud to be your mama.

The seasons, they go 'round and 'round

"you're older than they were then"

Happiest Mother's Day

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.

3 John 1:4

With each baby born into this family, Mother's day becomes more and more joyous. Those years of training up the child are bearing fruit at long last. I am grateful beyond words for the blessing of being a mother; for the five spirited souls that were entrusted to my inexperienced watch care. They have led me and guided me.

To you, my babies now grown, with spirited little souls of your own to train up,

I have this to share:

These days will pass in a flash.

On those endless, bone weary nights when you are rocking a little one singing "I Am a Child of God" for the millionth time, wondering if it matters, it does.

When you get a ticket on the way to church because 2 or 3 kids are struggling, unbelted in the front seat, trying to get their shoes on the right feet and the flashing lights follow you into the parking lot, don't turn around.

When you realize that you are spending 90% of sacrament meeting in the foyer with a squirmy toddler, keep going.

Keep sharing your gifts, your passions, your light and believe.

I look forward to the festivities tomorrow.

I'll start my day early, jumping in Li'l Red to surprise my mom at church in Wyoming. I'll hurry home for a BBQ with the Utah families and to open the packages that have arrived from the Washington kids.

As much as I look forward to all of it, nothing gives me as much deep joy as watching you love your little ones.

I'm sharing the following words written by Lindsay.

This is testament to me that my daughter knows.

She knows what matters most.

This is what makes me grateful to be a mom.

From Lindsay:

"Lucas, my biggest boy was heartbroken tonight when his dad took off on a fishing trip without him. In one of my craziest mothering moments – I decided that it couldn’t be that hard – and that I could take my boys fishing myself. I loaded up the car with boys + a fishing pole and we headed to the pond. I was terrified the entire drive over. The bait, cast + wait part I could handle. But what if Luc actually caught a silly fish??? Then what?! And he was really good, too. His casts were going far. I was getting nervous.
Luckily for me after 15 minutes or so on the bank - the playground on the other side of the pond seemed waaaaaay more enticing. The sun was going down but I told him we could spend a few minutes climbing on the toys. Right away he made a friend. I heard him ask a little boy in checkered converse– just like him – if he could play.
The new friend only spoke Spanish.
Except for “yes, friend!”
I overheard Luc ask him once what his name was. He didn’t really answer and my silly boy continued to call his new friend “Sir” whenever he needed to get his attention. They were inseparable until I had to convince Lucas that it really was time to go – that the sun really had gone down for the night.

++++

I am the mother of boys. Lucas Jude and Gavin West. Two wild, crazy, LOUD!, messy, smelly, sweet, adorable boys.

++++

Danyelle asked me the other day if I would be willing to write a little something for My Favorite Things about my “Favorite Mothering Moment.” After finally getting said wild and crazy boys to bed last night – I laid down in my own bed, exhausted - to think of what exactly I was going to write. Then came the lump in my throat when I realized that the day had not been one of my finest mothering days. For most of it I’d been trying to get things done around them.
There was a lot of - sit down! Hold still! and SHHHHHHHH!
I recognized that they had not actually spent the day interrupting me – I, however, had spent the entire day interrupting them.
That my all time favorite mothering moments had happened while letting my children - be children.

++++

Tonight as I pushed Gavin, my littlest boy – laughing in the baby swing – fishing pole stashed back in the car – I kept the corner of my eye on Lucas.
Watching him silently play with his new friend, “Sir.”
Running, jumping, climbing, digging – and laughing.
My mama heart smiled at this moment of happiness and marked this day as one of my favorites.
My boys."

turn around you're a young mom with babes of your own

Jeff, Lindsay, Natalie, Christine and Jade,

You fill my heart to bursting as I ponder the gift of being your mom.

I Love You

Seize the Day

Announcing the arrival of . . .

Little Red

After one heck of a gestation and a very long labor,

she is here!

The stats ~

Arrived: at sunset on May Day

MI: 2,200

Mini Cooper Clubman S 2009

6 speed Turbo

Live happy, my girl. . .

We have worlds to explore